So today a really persistant creep tried to chat me up. Before anyone yells “Chatting someone up doesn’t make you a creep!” let me just clarify that this guy refused to leave and kept making inappropriate comments about my appearance and what he would do if I was his girlfriend despite my polite and repeated requests that I wasn’t interested and would like to be left alone in peace. Multiple mentions of my soon-to-be spouse didn’t deter him either so I decided to switch tactics.
I pretended to be a velociraptor. A very loud velociraptor. So loud in fact by the end of the first minute the entire cafe was staring at us. I watched the fellow squirm in embarassment and confusion as I responded to everything he said with screeching and clicking noises and jerky reptilian movements. At the five minute mark, he got up looking visibly uncomfortable and muttered something about having a nice day and left.
That was the most fun I’ve ever had pretending to be a dinosaur. Next time I might try Godzilla impressions.
This text from a close mate of mine will haunt me to the end of my days. Everytime I feel like the struggle to hang on is just too much and I might not be able to keep my shit together any longer I read this text over and over.
It’s a loving reminder to avoid the dangerous/self destructive behaviour he knows I’m always tempted to act out when I’m severely depressed.
It’s a loving reminder that acknowledges my current state of depression and reciprocates with support and the understanding that when I said I was “too sad to do anything” I wasn’t making flakey excuses to bail on something we had planned for weeks and were super stoked to attend; I meant it literally and just getting out of bed to text him an apology was my major achievement of the day.
It’s a loving reminder that there are people who love and care about me which is something I forget easily because I constantly have trouble accepting the fact that I am beloved even when told straight up, “I love you K.” regardless friend, family or partner.
It’s a loving reminder that I’m not alone and if shit hits the fan I can always call for help from this person without having to fear being judged negatively or treated with the usual mental health stigmas.
THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS
DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????
I’m fucking dying
I never want to lose this post.
Pears can just fuck off too. ‘Cause they’re gorgeous little beasts, but they’re ripe for half an hour, and you’re never there. They’re like a rock or they’re mush. In the supermarket, people banging in nails. “I’ll just put these shelves up, mate, then you can have the pear.” … So you think, “I’ll take them home and they’ll ripen up.” But you put them in the bowl at home, and they sit there, going, “No! No! Don’t ripen yet, don’t ripen yet. Wait til he goes out the room! Ripen! Now now now!”
What did the velociraptor say to the bear?
Nothing. They’re from different time periods. The velociraptor is dead.
We made a new friend at our skate session today. She was super sweet and very friendly — probably a wandering house cat because the car park we skate in is in a country club type place with lots of surrounding residential areas.
She was very curious and had a good time checking out the trunk of D.’s car. She spent quite a long time investigating the interiors of our cars. Thankfully she didn’t pee in them.
We named her Zorro because she has a ‘mask’ on her face.She liked resting on O.’s bag and wrestling with the unzipped pockets.
We figured out she also liked hunting loose longboard wheels/head petting and took more breaks than usual to hang out with her.
O. and I tried teaching her how to skate. She really liked being on a longboard but she was too small to push off. She wasn’t really pleased when I stopped the longboard she was chilling on from rolling about.
I just wanted to share the story of our cute little skate buddy Zorro with you because she made us happy. It’s unlikely we’ll see her again anytime soon as cats rarely wander the car park we skate in. Goodbye Zorro!